Realms of Constant Change

Ocean

2011-02-19T08:44:00.000-08:00

I know it has been quite sometime....

i know i shouldn't have swam up the surface...

i should have continued on diving ...but i needed air....

i missed the beauty down under again....

i miss the peace, the beauty and the tranquility...

forgive me....im only human.....

forgive me... forgive me...forgive me....

as for now, i wish im at the beach.... feet buried in the sand.... a coffee mug in my hand.... watching the waves splash, memories start to flash....

No point

2010-04-17T09:42:00.000-07:00

May Allah grant us the inner strength and peace to reach our true utmost potential...

May Allah protect us and guide us - for without it we would be fooled in this worldly maze that has no end... "Dan ingatlah kehidupan di dunia ini tidak lain hanyalah kesenengan bagi orang yang terpedaya" (Ali 'Imran 3:185)

17 times a day we ask The Most gracious the Most Merciful to guide us...ihdinassiratolmustaqim...

Yet sometime i loose track Ya Allah... i get off balanced...i fall down...please let me get back up... and be the person im suppose to be...

Allah is too kind..too close...too forgiving, too loving...but why do we ask and seek upon 'elsewhere' for contentment?

NIlai semula....Kuatkan minda...

Genggam bara sehingga menjadi api...

Lots of Love,
Dina

BAGASI

2010-04-06T08:01:00.000-07:00

What a nite, what a week, what a day...What a year...what an hour, what a minute what a second...

Yes time...it flies like the lovely wings of the hummingbird... fast...too fast but unlike the hummingbird time cant fly back...or around...suka hati..masa mengikut masa...??? i dont know...bila malam ni kepala memang tak betul...

DO we wish we have more time? DONT... coz when you do..you'll make no good use out of it... we tend to waste it...trash it in the bin... updating ridiculous status in FB and nosing around peoples profiles..when it has NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU AT ALL... alahai manusia.....

Manusia....

Actually i wanted to write on this ridiculous trend of LV bags...tapi teringat kat burung humming yang kecil...burung terkecil dunia rasanya tu....magnificent creations of Allah the All Mighty..the most Merciful..The most Loving......

kejap..teringat burung hummingbird ke ingatkan masa yang berputar dgn laju?...make up your mind... argh....

back to the bag....ok fine, LV ke Gucci or whatever other "branded-im so class if i carry it attitude" it drives me nuts..NO, NO not because i like it.... because i see women buying fake ones just to be seen wearing it...itu satu...dan orang yang menghabiskan puluhan ribu untk BEG TANGAN!!!!!

IT JUST DOESNT MAKE SENSE!!! AT ALL!!! whos brainwashing our minds?? WHY i ask? A bag is a bag lah!!!! purpose nak angkat barang kan...in my case nak "campak barang dalam...." Macam keretalah....urghhhh...kena ke pakai kereta mahal..a car is car lah...you need to drive an expensive car ke to gain respect....KESIANNYA.....(ok fine akan ada orang argue nak selesa) apa kereta yang tak mahal tak selesa ke? suka hatilah...tapi bag????

orang miskin tak cukup makan.... anak yatim ramai... beli bag mahal??? whos producing this crazy overpriced bags??? Jawablah sendiri...kalau Muslims tak pe lah jugak..... alahai....

first thing they do when we enter a function is to look at your bag!!!!!!! EXCUSE ME??? those with LV sit down together-gether.... eeeeee... lain kali i nak bawak beg VInci je....tengok reaction dorang...huhu...

Pleaselah... you need a bag to make you feel good about yourself? Take it away what do you have?????????

NOTHING? go figure!!!!

Rasa nak sedekah semua beg LV dan mengarut tu kat orang..
BTW, buruklah LV prints all over bag itu....i never did find it flattering since day one......

tapi buat masa ni i tak ada bag lain.... jap..nanti cari dulu...kalau nampak i angkat tu maknaya tak ada masa tukar pada bag lain...nanti nak singgah vincci kalau ada masa...they have nicer bags!!! huhu

SUKA...RELA

2010-03-25T10:05:00.000-07:00

I give tribute to people who do things voluntarily, not wanting any gain, any fame, any thanks, "anything" basically ...but just for the sake of doing good...because doing good makes them feel good...

I think this "value" is instilled very young not directly but indirectly buy non other than the people who influences your life the most - yes that's right.....the parents or guardian. If one was raised with ideas like "tak payahlah...menyusahkan diri sendiri buat apa" - it is subconsciously then engraved in ones head that indeed "helping for the sake of helping" sangatlah menyusahkan...

I know people like that..selfish (but they dont realize) dan sangatlah self centered. Memang tak suka menolong...kalau dah TERpaksa dan DIpaksa barulah nak tolong. Tak merasa NIKMAT menolong dan memberi. Tolong tu memanglah kena susah sikit, kalau senang dan tak susah tak menolong lah tu...

I thank god i was brought up by Ummi... Ummi yang gemar menolong dan memberi. Nampak orang berjalan lebih lagi yang mengandung dan tua ditumpangkan dalam mobil kecil kami. Baju lama tak pernah disimpan sampai berhabuk dan kepam. Duit dan makanan tidak pernah dikira dan dicatu, namun rezeki sentiasa ada. InsyaAllah Ummi, ill try to instill these values in my Amna, Azra and Imran along the way. My abi? never ever kedekut dengan ilmu... very extremely generous indeed...

I received a call from Abi who is actually in Dhaka, Bangladesh - poverty stricken country that needs many good souls to lend a hand... Abi is flying to arrange some micro-finance help to poor people over there. Abi also mentioned the team from Malaysia's MERCY diketuai oleh Prof Dr Ahmad Sukari Halim dari USM yang memberi rawatan pembedahan percuma kepada kanak-kanak yang mempunyai masaalah bibir sumbing. Mereka tinggalakan keluarga, negara, keselesaan dan tidak mendapat habuan wang walau sedikit pun.

Tertanyakah kita kenapa mereka sanggup melakuknnya? Kerana mereka insan berjiwa mulia. Saya berdoa saya dapat menyumbang sebegitu rupa, memberi sinar kepada manusia yang memerlukan.... Kerana apa? kerana saya pasti apa yang mereka peroleh kembali yang tidak berupa apa jua "kebendaan dunia" lebih memuaskan jiwa dan raga!

Tanyalah pada diri apa pula yang telah kita beri? dengan sukarela?

I personally think all university students should be made to join an NGO and volunteer.. it does wonders, social work... it needs to be encouraged and promoted to those who never even thought about it...it does change perceptions and views of life and values...

:) May Allah bless you all.... those who do good without wanting anything in return,may we fill ourselves with the same spirit....

END

2010-03-25T09:37:00.000-07:00

Why is it do i feel so lonely?
Maybe because tonight its just me only?

Why is it that i am too busy?
Which causes me to get really-really dizzy...

Why is it that i need to do all that?
Because maybe i just don't want to be fat...
I don't want to fall with a spat...
Maybe i refuse to just sit and chat...

Ive decided to mend, fix and bend...
Never to continue that particular trend,
Because eventually, i know,where.......... its all going to end....

SAYA SANGAT MARAH...Tempat tisu pun boleh DIHIAS DAN BERHIAS - dengan kulit kerang lagi!

2010-03-21T06:19:00.000-07:00

I was extremely disappointed..bukan dengan kotak tisu atau kulit kerang...but with myself, also with tv3 and the "ahli panel" invited during last Friday's al-kuliyyah...

The topic given was, of all things to talk about in this world ialah - "berhias"... I declined the invitation but was called in again to come..so i somehow obliged.. i thought i could do and spread some good...or be usefull, or learn something new...which i indeed DID!

Now i know berhias itu "sangat sinonim" dengan wanita..tapi perlukah kita menyempitkan pemikiran kita apabila berbicara mengenai "berhias" dan seolah-olahnya tiada apa lain di dunia ini berhias melainkan wanita...

Lepas tu nak tanya... seorang wanita muslimah..yang sudah memakai hijab nak berhias banyak mana sangat...memanglah ada adabnya, ada syariat yang perlu diikut... tiada yang menyangkal... tapi sekiranya minda kita ini cuma menyampaikan apa yang HARAM..HARAM... TAK BOLEH..TAK BOLEH...takutlah orang dengan islam...dari nak pakai tudung terus tak nak pakai... menakutkan betul....

"HATTA NAMPAK JARI KAKI PUN TAK BOLEH"... (dahlah waktu tu saya memang tak pakai stokin, saja nak malukan saya ke uztaz?) Takkanlah tengok jari kaki wanita pun jiwa lelaki boleh tak tenteram???- kenapa nak kena cari jari kaki pun??? pandang muka jelah kalau nak cakap...)

dengan nada yang bangga seolah-olah merendahkan wanita... "tempatnya di rumah", (nak tanya......yang Saidatina Khadijah tu bukan buisness women berjaya??, beliau tak pula duduk di rumah saja kan?) "wanita itu sendiri adalah aurat", "mencabut misai dan janggut pun tidak boleh..HARAM".... Uztaz juga yang kata pakai stokin tu ada banyak pendapat....dan yang jelas aurat dan dipersetujui oleh semua ialah muka dan tapak tangan.... kenapa perlu fokus ke sana (jari kaki) dahulu...??? uztaz....orang yang sudah tinggi imannya bolehlah kita perincikan ke jari kaki...ini, masalah sekarang, kita nak pastikan tutup dulu yang atas kepala...kita nak galakkan wanita muslim bangga dengan imej muslimah..bukannya menakutkan mereka... ADUHAIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!

kenapa tak boleh positf sikit? macamna umat islam nak berepan dan berdiri di pentas antarabangsa, berjumpa , berdebat dan melakukan kebaikan bersama mat salleh dan mereka yang bukan islam sekiranya kita masih berfikiran sebigini????

Berhias....? AUrat....bila cakap pasal lelaki pakai emas dan sutera tak ada pulak nak cakap, HARAAAAMMMM...uztaz cuma kata begini - "TAK BOLEHLAH NANTI NAMPAK TAK GAGAH, KITA BERI PADA WANITA", hello, adakah wanita itu tidak gagah maksudnya.....lemah?

LEpas tu dia kata pada pembukaan al kuliyyah "kita tak boleh beri topik ini dibahas oleh wanita nanti di akan mengikut nafsunya..." (macam perli saya je uztaz)yelah wanita 99 nafsu ye uztaz? sebab tulah sumbang mahram jadi...bapa meratapi tubuh anak sendiri......

Maafkan saya, tapi saya sangat marah!!!! Kecewa sebenarnya...Pada saya, WANITA BERHIAS BIASANYA PUN UNTUK MENARIK PERHATIAN LELAKI..KENAPA LELAKI TAK MENEGUR WANITA...sebab dia suka????? jadi nak tanya nafsu siapa yang lebih sebenarnya?????? LELAKI YANG MENGEKSPOITASI WANITA walhal lelaki jualah yang sepatutnya bertindak sebagai pelindung......!

Aurat? cakap pasal aurat WANITAAAAAAAA JEEEEEE..... kenapa uztaz tak highlight...ayat 30 surah AnNur mengenai aurat itu diturunkan UNTUK KAUM LELAKI DAHULU! "Lelaki tundukkan pandangan!!!!!" bukan wanita first...LELAKI FIRST!!!!!!!

Uztaz, saya merayu, meminta dan mengajak uztaz membuka minda sikit uztaz...berhias itu bukanlah hanya milik wanita...kini MASJID PUN DIHIAS DENGAN MELAMPUI BATAS....yang patut dihias masjid itu adalah dengan jemaah yang ramai bukan chandelier yang berjuta harganya..... kenapa tak sebut?

Kenapa tak sebut mereka yang menghias rumah bagai istana walhal di tepi mereka ada teratak usang yang hampir roboh.....

Kenapa tak cuba POSITIF sikit mengajak manusia menghiaskan diri dengan ilmu...dan ilmu itu bukan tertakluk kepada ilmu akhirat tapi ilmu dunia!!!! Kita ingin bersaing dan mencengkam dunia di peringkat GLOBAL UZTAZ!!!!!!! bukan hanya di bawah tempurung yang kecil!!!!!!

Cubalah tukar sedikit cara kita melihat sesuatu perkara dan AJAK manusia MENGHIASI DIRI DENGAN AKHLAK YANG BAIK....itulah perhiasan yang paling indah..... berhias juga kan..tapi itu nada yang lebih POSITIF....

Bagaimana para lelaki yang kini kita lihat lebih BERHIAS dari wanita....Banyak sangat Uztaz..atau Uztaz tak peka dengan isu semasa yang kini berlaku dan berleluasa...PLEASE talk about REAL issues

....tapi ini, dok cakap pasal dekat rumah pun kena pakai stokin dan baju lengan panjang walaupun bila basuh pinggan...macam nilah uztaz, saya ada cadangan...kalau dah duduk dengan ipar duai, suruh orang lelaki yang tak pakai lengan panjang tu je yang cuci pinggan.... atau cakap pada mereka jangan menggatal nak turun bawah, duduk diam-diam dalam bilik, sebab kita nak buat kerja.... (memang tak patut betul... uztaz macam nak menyalahkan wanita pula kalau sekiranya terjadi perkara tak diingini, sebab ..salah kita, kita tak pakai stokin... walhal orang lelaki yang gila sahaja akan bernafsu terhadap iparnya sendiri......eeee geraaamnyaaaaa)

Bagaimana pula lelaki yang meng"hiaskan" kereta mereka..berhutang untuk kereta dan jam mewah?

Bagaimana mereka yang berhias bukan secara fizikal tetapi dengan barangan berjenama harga puluhan ribu ringgit.... beg LV...Gucci..Prada..Channel...and whatever else...saya betul-betul tak faham...dan tak suka sebenarnya...what MODESTY are you talking about??? (ok saya mengaku, saya ada beberapa beg bejenama, 2 diberi...dua saya beli, itupun saya beli dah lama dulu, sebab terikut rakan..diajak sebenarnya....eeeeeee... tak nak beli lagi...i dont need it to make me feel good about myself)

kenapa ini tidak disentuh? kenapa sempitnya pemikiran anda? kenapa saya tidak bersuara? kerana tercengang dengan "kecilnya" fikiran serang uztaz yang sepatutnya berilmu.....

satu jam dok mencungkil kesalahan wanita dan bercakap mengenai kelemahan wanita...mengenai gincu dan pemerah pipi...how so very-very extremely shallow....!! its very easy to do that...talk about the MALE specis punya responsibility for a change why dont you....i didnt believe it!!!! i still dont..but like Ooi said "Dina let it go!" so i shall...after pouring this out!

sebaik-baik perhiasan adalah wanita yang solehah......... THE END

DOMES and DECISSIONS - 2 D's

2010-03-13T18:52:00.000-08:00

Of decisions.... and the best ones to make...isnt it a daily pendulum in all?

Decisions we make, will bring about implications... implications will result in how the decisions then effect your life - now we shouldn't think of the short-term-benefit we would receive, rather the long term benefit that will then will make an impact on our journey and life...

Studies show that even if we do know that the short term 'pleasure' will indeed do us no use, but humans tend to opt for "instant pleasure" ... almost automatically... we would not think and care of the implications it brings...satisfy your innate desires.... so Freud was right...? NO..NO... well...in a way...but then thats a whole different story...

As i stare at this ridiculous blue dome from this huge glass window dressed with vertical blinds that is senget benget and oh so aesthetically bad... im thinking.. why is it that there is a need for domes? and blue roofs?

Can we do without it..the domes..it cost so much.. and serves no purpose... you have it everywhere... the domes.... were not in Saudi... its a symbol one might say...yeah were so stuck onto symbols... we dont need symbols... or do we?? the environmental factors like the wheather..... are not taken into consideration...decorative saje... macam tulah kat malaysia ni... semua nak di"bedakkan"...nak decorative, nak tunjuk baik, nak berlakon... urgh.... nobody spill the beans like how its suppose to...sweep everything under the carpet...

jangan cakap benda yang walaupun betul.... tapi tak elok....diam saja... SAMPAI BILA? The truth hurts...sooner or later it will come out....

BREAK jap - im so lega...i dropped one subject this sem coz by the look of it..i cant cope with it. I think i made the right choice... sangat lega tika ini...

Initially i thought, why not. just push myself..but there's so much one can do... Thank you Allah... exams on 10th and 11th April..wish me luck..... im soooooooooooo takut... sebab?

sebab im a woman who strives for perfection...and why is it when you do people think youre weird...mediocrity is very well accepted...

well we try to at least... strive for it...perfection i mean.... and NO, its not wrong....and yes, normal is boring!

ANother D, so make that 3....

-Dina-

-T- is for tomato and tired...

2010-03-12T14:01:00.000-08:00

It was a loonggg tiring day, this week i pushed myself, my driving, my energy, my thinking, my time, my talking, my everything to the max....

I think i better go for a health check..pushing yourself constantly cant be a good thing... stress is not good... so many things happening, so many want a piece of me, yet theres only so much i can give...

I have my children who needs it more..and then theres Mr H...i mean I... oh me oh my... at least the meetings with ALaf 21 and telaga biru went on so well...

Buku saya akan dikeluarkan pada hari ibu ini InsyaAllah...tidak ku sangka, perjalanannya amat panjang...

Thank you Tomato for helping me discover, so many things... i cant help it, i really thank you.. and i constantly feel so great when i put you in my sald..without the red tomato, salad is so dull... i didnt really like tomatoes last time.. but after realizing tomatoes give you incredible benefits i love it now..yet selalu nak minta tomato masuk dalam salad bowl, saya segan, sebab saya tau tomato ada timun, dan saya ada celery... huhu..

In case you dont know by now... i love you tomato..in a nice healthy tomato way :)

Perbezaan

2010-03-08T06:26:00.000-08:00

Saudara Faisal Tehrani,

Moga saudara dan Dr Asri boleh menjadi kawan baik selepas ini. Saya amat mengagumi beliau.Faisal Tehrani. Seorang insan yang mempunyai daya pemikiran yang "lain", seolah melangkau pemikiran normal insan biasa, ke satu alam yang dalam.... Ianya mungkin mengelirukan mereka yang biasa... tapi ini anugerah buatnya. The spade understands....

Pemikiran yang berbeza, amat saya hormati. Apa yang beliau fikirkan usah ditanya kerana mungkin anda akan menutup mata dan telinga. Saudara, banyak lagi buku saudara yang belum sempat saya baca, semoga InsyaAllah akan dicuri masa yang tiada untuk menyelak satu atau dua.

Biarlah kita berbeza pendapat, perbezaan pada saya harus diraikan. Uniknya dan indahnya manusia kerana kita berbeza. Hikmahnya jiwa kerana tidak mengharap semua mengikut kita semata.

Mana tahu satu hari apa yang kita rasakan benar ternyata dangkal sama sekali...Tiada paksaan dalam Islam. Cuma amalan terus menerus mencari kebenaran... Doa saya semoga kita semua menemuinya....

Selamat Maju dan terus maju! And that goes to all of you too!!!

Sendiri

2010-03-07T07:47:00.000-08:00

Ilham yang ku cari,
Semangat yang ku ingini,

Juang dalam diri,
Untuk mengubah persepsi,

Kata Pakar psikologi,
Tidak ada apa yang lebih tinggi,

Dari kepercayaan sendiri,
Terhadap hidup dan diri.....

Selamat mencari,
Sehinggalah mati......

Ilham yang ku cari,
Semangat kan ku jumpai.....

Niat perlulah suci,
Sujud dan rebahkan diri,
menagislah di bumi... sendiri.....

hanya sendiri....

Ke mana kita?

2010-02-18T08:48:00.000-08:00

Secara jujurnya saya tidak mahu memberi apa-apa komen lagi mengenai siaran akhbar membabitkan kenyataan saya mahupun perjumpaan dengan Tok Guru yang saya hormati. Didesak kanan dan kiri, diperkata itu dan ini. Ada yang suka ada yang benci. Lumrah hidup sudah pun saya fahami.

Beginilah saudara saudari semua, banyak lagi masalah dunia dan Malaysia yang perlu diselesaikan segera. Saya? cuma mampu buat yang terdaya. Manusia berbagai ragam berbagai rupa. Masing-masing berlumba-lumba...ke mana? saya tanya... mereka tiada pun jawapannya...

Thank you...A short note..

2010-02-15T21:00:00.000-08:00

Thank you....
Even if it isn't real,

Thank you
For how it made me feel,

Delighted, inspired, humbled and that's a great big deal...
The enveloped is thus sealed........

May i know where to post it now...
May it get there somehow....

Inspirasi dan Imaginasi

2010-02-11T08:10:00.000-08:00

Inspirasi...Imaginasi...

Cukup menggambarkan diri saya. Saya tak mahu dua I ini lari dari diri.

Inspiration di kamus bererti = "the act or power of moving the intellect or emotions."

I loved being inspired. A strong magical emotion will sweep all over me... My mind imagines the impossible. A strong current like an electrical shock goes through my body.

People inspire me, events inspire me, words inspire me, spaces and nature inspires me. Books and conversations....

"Feeling inspired is good, taking action on the inspiration is much greater"

I believe in being the best you can be. Giving all you've got. Change things you can. Do good without asking for anything in return...

Imagination.... you cant learn this skill from books for nobody can teach it. Imagination is developed through out your life especially during your early years of a child. If you fail to develop imagination you fail to develop a wholesome person. I find society today particularly in Malaysia, we lack the skill to imagine. Einstein said "imagination is more important than knowledge" - simply means to me, knowledge you are able to learn, open the book, search the net...there you go, the answers there. Imagination? You cant plagiarize it... you cant read it if its not already in you...

“In the 21st century, creative problem solvers, independent thinkers, and people with expert social acumen will inevitably surpass those who have simply learned to be efficient at getting the right answer……the individuals who make the most significant contributions – go beyond finding answers to already formulated problems.” - Pasek, K. H. et al (2003) Einstein Never Used Flashcards: How our children really learn – and why they need to play more and memorize less

How do you develop imagination? In children...? read for them. Talk to them. Train their mind that there is no correct answer... Anything is possible in this world. Let them tell you stories, don't laugh at them. Laugh WITH them.

In adults? Go and be inspired and talk to inspiring people....

Now good night! I seriously need to be inspired...anyone? Nights as silent as tonight brings such serenity to my soul... a tad lonely... but actually i just have to finish my work!

ASSIGMENT LAMA.....tapi bermakna....

2010-02-04T03:24:00.000-08:00

Introduction

“Form and function are a unity, two sides of one coin. In order to enhance function, appropriate form must exist or be created.”
Ida P. Rolf
Every Malaysian has the image or at the very least knows the narrative of Tunku Abdul Rahman leading the nation and shouting ‘Merdeka’ seven times on the 31st of August in the newly built Merdeka Stadium as a symbol of Malaya’s independence. However, Malaysia as we know it today did not exist until Monday the 16th of September 1963 when the Federation of Malaya, Singapore, British North Borneo and Sarawak joined together to form a 14-state federation.

The formation of Malaysia created a unique nation of diverse races -- Malay, Indian, Eurasian, Chinese, Nyonya, and the indigenous people from Borneo. With such a diverse population, now numbering almost 25 million, it is no surprise that unity and diversity are two sides of a coin of immense importance to all. The 6th Prime Minister, Dato' Sri Mohd Najib Bin Tun Hj Abd Razak himself has said that his lifelong dream is of a united, peaceful and prosperous Malaysia, with abundant opportunities for all citizens. After becoming Prime Minister he proposed his concept of 1Malaysia which has already been introduced on his website on September 17th 2008. According to Dato' Sri Mohd Najib:
“Kita berdiri, kita berfikir dan bertindak sebagai bangsa Malaysia. One People. Dan kita mengambil tindakan-tindakan berdasarkan kehendak semua kumpulan etnik dalam negara kita;Ini bukan bererti kita mengetepikan dasar afirmatif, dasar untuk menolong kaum Bumiputera asalkan dasar itu dilaksanakan dengan cara yang adil dan memberi pertimbangan kepada golongan Bumiputera yang layak mendapat sesuatu pertimbangan daripada kerajaan.Kita keluar daripada cara bertindak dalam tembok etnik yang kita amalkan sejak sekian lama”.
“We stand together; we think and act as a unified race of Malaysia. One People. And the actions we take will be based on the desires of all ethnic groups in our country; in doing so this does not mean we will put aside affirmative policies, policies created to help Bumiputera for as long as these policies are implemented fairly and give due consideration to those Bumiputera who rightfully warrant consideration from the government. We will move away from past practice of basing our actions on an ethnic-based framework”.

Five decades of hegemonic rule by UMNO was broken when the opposition coalition DAP, PKR and PAS took over the state governments of Penang, Kedah, Kelantan, Perak and Selangor in the March 2008 election. The blow of losing their two-thirds majority in Parliament for the first time in history was not as shocking as was the realisation that voters were breaking away from ethnic-based politics, reflecting the people’s concern over the ruling government’s racially-based policies. What followed was a drawn out period of what proved to be quite controversial political rethinking within UMNO. This eventually resulted in the present Prime Minister, Dato' Sri Mohd Najib Bin Tun Razak succeeding Tun Abdullah bin Haji Ahmad Badawi. The birth of 1Malaysia in the aftermath of the BN defeat could be seen as a reaction to the rejection of BN by the people.
1Malaysia claims to aspire to preserve and enhance the unity in a diverse Malaysia. Conceptually it still accepts the basic principles of the National Economic Policy (NEP) posited on the eradication of poverty irrespective of race and economic restructuring ironically launched by the Prime Minister’s late father as a consequence of the May 13 race riots.

The Prime Minister, hoping to regain the confidence of the Malaysian public has now added “People First, Performance Now” to his 1Malaysia concept. Fundamentally, 1Malaysia is meant to signal that not a single person in Malaysia would be sidelined because of race or religion but at the same time the policies related to affirmative action will be continued.

Interview Background

The selection of candidates for the interview consisted of five upper middle class Malay Malaysians between the ages of thirty to sixty five. The age bracket was selected in order to obtain candidates with above average economic status and education level. The selection of Malay Malaysians was a conscious choice in order to present the view of the dominant majority in Malaysia’s demographic mix and within this group the socio-economic group with most impact on public thought at least in the urban areas. As there were only five persons interviewed it was not possible to get a sample representing all the ethnic and socio-economic groups in the country. This survey then assess the perception of Malaysian’s Malay upper middle class on 1Malaysia and how it affects them as a majority as well as the perceived consequences for the different racial minorities.

The interview can be classified as an open-ended Information Giving type of interview used to obtain information on the beliefs, opinions, attitudes and feelings of those interviewed as well as their knowledge of the facts behind these issues.

Issue

The goal of this project is to determine the extent a group of Malaysians understand the 1Malaysia concept. This project is significant because 1Malaysia is directed towards the inculcation of the value of universal citizenship and civic commitment in Malaysia. Following a major change in the political landscape, it would seem that Malaysia’s Prime minister felt that 1Malaysia would be the solution to earn the trust and confidence of the people, particularly the non-Malays who seem to have rejected UMNO. The ambitious goal of 1Malaysia is perhaps more of a symbol than a practical programme as, according to recent surveys Malaysians see themselves as members of either their ethnic group -- Malay, Chinese or Indian -- and many Malays in particular, place their religious identity before citizenship. Thus, the interview would be a moderately good source of information regarding the understanding of 1Malaysia by Malay Malaysians.

Interview Summary

Each interview, lasting approximately thirty minutes, was carried out in an informal manner; unstructured answers and a free discussion of the issues was encouraged. Each interview was based on a series of questions.

1. Where did you first see or hear the one Malaysia slogan/concept?

Every respondent was aware of 1Malaysia and who created the concept. Respondents obtained information regarding 1Malaysia from the mainstream media particularly in the television and newspapers. One respondent illustrated how extensive the plugging of 1Malaysia was when she noted: “I even see it on Facebook”.

2. Are you aware of the fact that 1Malaysia has 8 principles it seeks to address?
1. Budaya Kecemerlangan Culture of Excellence
2. Ketabahan Perseverance
3. Rendah hati Humility
4. Penerimaan Acceptance
5. Kesetiaan Loyalty
6. Meritokrasi Meritocracy
7. Pendidikan Education
8. Integriti Integrity

Yes or No?

Out of five, only one respondent was aware and able to describe in detail the 8 principles of 1Malaysia. Others were not aware of all the 8 principles but deduced that there would evidently be values put forward to represent the concept of 1Malaysia. A particularly interesting observation was on the order of the 8 principles and it was highlighted by one respondent who pointed out that the first principle should be the last for the reason it would not be possible to achieve a culture of excellence without adhering to and comprehensively implementing the other seven principles.

3. Do you feel Malaysians understand this concept?
Yes or No? Why ?

To this question, every one of the respondents answered a resounding No. None of the respondent felt that the 1Malaysia concept had been explained adequately. This particular question offered an interesting perspective into the perception of the respondents. It indicated that they were cynical about the aims of the government and pessimistic about its implementation.

4. Do Malaysians understand, accept and tolerate other races/religions?
Yes or No? Why ?

No respondent could answer a definite Yes or No and opted to explain their stand on the issue of tolerance and acceptance. One interesting response likened it to the relationship between a father, mother and the child, “each one has its place yet each one has to give in to the position of the other”.

Another respondent offered some valuable insight. He stated:
“Since independence among certain sections of society there seems to be less and less acceptance and toleration and understanding of other races and religions, particularly among certain groups of Muslims and some evangelical Christians but on the other hand there is a growing number of all races who are becoming more tolerant”.

“We need to remember that are more than 60,000 non-Chinese in Chinese primary schools. There is no racial discrimination in these schools but the UMNO Minister of Higher Education told the UMNO general assembly a few years back that as long as he was the minister, he would not allow a single non-bumiputera to be admitted to UiTM. The government school system is dominated by one racial group. Is 1Malaysia going to change this?”

It seems that interracial issues of acceptance and understanding only become a concern or interest so long as it does not personally affect them. If it touches on areas which are sensitive, tolerance and understanding no longer have a place.

5. What do you understand about the Chinese, Indians, Kadazandusuns and Ibans in terms of religion, culture and such? Please elaborate.

Almost all respondent understood the diversity of Malaysia which they saw as encompassing the Chinese, Indians, Kadazandusuns and Ibans. A few respondents through personal experience and encounters understood the cultural practices, values and beliefs of other races. The other respondents on the other hand offered no insight and had only a superficial idea of the other races limited to holidays, celebrations and what they saw as the superstitious beliefs of the other races.

A particular comment from one of the respondent was alarming. When asked about the Kadazandusun and Ibans he responded: “They are a minority, even more so than the Chinese and Indian so their cultural practices are not as significant.”

Ironically another respondent highlighted the fact that “the Kadazandusuns' biggest problem now is the fact that their percentage within the enlarged population of Sabah (now 3 million) has been seriously reduced, and the fact that they have actually become a minority. This is causing tension”

Perhaps it is the lack of sensitivity and the comfort of being within a confined race group that hinders the inter relations between Malaysians. One other respondent highlighted in a similar context that Malay Malaysians hold strongly onto the ideals of Raja Melayu. This ideal equates the supremacy of the King or ruler to the Malay race and nation thus reflecting on the position of Malays within Malaysia and the concept of Ketuanan Melayu.

6. How can this 1Malaysia concept become a reality when many Malaysians don’t even understand or seek to understand each other? What should be done?

One respondent answered: “If the Prime Minister is serious to sell his People Come First, One Malaysia Concept, then UMNO and all the constituent parties of BN should be dissolved and a new party formed so that all races can join and policies will not be race-based but provide equality, fairness and justice for all”

Another respondent tried to approach it from a non-political perspective: “Look at what unites them…. Malaysians love food, so perhaps food could be the way or at least a start.”

An obvious problem with the understanding on inter-racial and cultural relationship presented in this interview is the lack of understanding on Malaysian history. This was evident in all except two respondents who were older and evidently had some knowledge and interest in history. The other respondents knew nothing or at the very least little and held unsubstantiated historical facts. This was reflected in the suggestion of what should be done.
“We are all fine and happy together, there is no need to get technical about it”
On the contrary another respondent stated: “Until and unless more Malaysians wake up to the reality that this nation cannot progress on sweet talk and nice sounding slogans alone, this country will continue to fall behind other competitors in the region.”
“How can there be One Malaysia when UMNO still holds on to race politics where policies implemented have racial overtones and marginalization of other Malaysian races and also the marginalization of many Malays and native people of Sabah and Sarawak?”

One respondent quoted Gomez "Malaysians have failed to integrate in any meaningful fashion, even after almost forty years of independence.” – Edmund Terrence Gomez in the book “Ethnic Futures – The state and identity politics in Asia”

7. In your opinion are Malaysian policies 'fair' to all their citizens in line with the 1Malaysia slogan? Such as the NEP, the government bonds, the quotas awards of scholarships and etc?

There was only one respondent out of the five who felt that the policies are fair. He stated
“We have to respect the special privileges – who founded the place... the country?” He believes that 1Malaysia would foster understanding and with that understanding, the maintaining of current and future affirmative action policies would be accepted by all.

Others stated:
“It will be difficult to have 1 Malaysia when there are discriminative policies in areas like education (scholarships, entry quotas), bank loans, NEP, AP, contract distributions. 1Malaysia will only show if equal rights are practiced and not the illusion called “special” rights. The excuse of hypocritical BN that non-Malays are threatening the “special” rights of Malays is rubbish. What’s the basis? The only threat is globalisation. Nothing else.”
“Where is 1 Malaysia when you have a newspaper like Utusan Malaysia? A newspaper that is so racist, so pro-UMNO, & consistently publishes articles to incite racial hatred among Malaysians. Newspapers like Utusan that are hindering unity.”
A particularly cynical statement was: “It should be; ‘May the best man win’, and not ‘your best friend wins.’ Unfortunately this is how it is in Malaysia. I believe rights and policies should be awarded based solely on merit.”
“Power and responsibility should be given to those who are the most all-round capable and trustworthy and who can perform. Malaysia must not consider meritocracy a bad word. We must not sweep failures, big and small, under the carpet to protect those of a certain race as this actually rewards fiascos and penalises successes. Performance must be objectively and tangibly assessed and well-rewarded regardless of race or religion. Decisions need to be made and implemented in a timely, informed and considered manner, not based on political considerations.”

8. Is 1Malaysia simply a political ploy or slogan?

There was a unanimous “Yes.” to this question.

“Yes, every national day we have a slogan… well it doesn’t mean if the slogan is gone … no longer being recited the impact of the slogan goes away with it… I suppose if it is a good cause perhaps a little change from the slogan would be better than nothing”

“Yes!!...Slogans are just so Malaysian... What would we do without slogans? How would we get attention?”

“Yes, I remember when Mahathir became PM, he came in with the slogan Bersih, Cekap, dan Amanah but his administration was neither bersih nor cekap nor amanah. Similarly, when Badawi became PM, he introduced the slogan Cemerlang, Gemilang dan Terbilang but under him, BN suffered its biggest loss ever and he was the most underperforming PM yet.”

It is evidently clear that for the respondents, 1Malaysia is purely a political slogan; be that as it may, none of the respondents rejected the concept. They felt that if a slogan was consistently and sincerely implemented there it would be good but, based on past performance; they were pessimistic of it having any lasting and significant impact.

Interview Interpretation

The interview went well, respondents were comfortable and responsive. Each respondent expressed personal views, suggestions and concerns. In accordance to the subject of the interview; the 1Malaysia concept, most respondents were aware of it on a superficial level mainly due to the massive endorsement and the barrage advertising pushing the concept in all the media, be it television, radio or the press. Out of the five, only two respondents really understood the details of 1Malaysia.

It was apparent throughout the interview that their socio-economic status made most of the respondents indifferent to the 1Malaysia concept and what it entails as it did not affect them on a personal level and therefore most of the respondents were not actively involved or concerned about it.

There was not a strong conviction of being able to form a united Malaysia despite the belief in the value of tolerance. Perceptions regarding other races by the Malays are still based on stereotypes and have not changed. However, towards the end of the interview sensitivity towards the minority races began to surface when hypothetical situations were briefly discussed.1Malaysia perhaps is an attempt to build a bridge where there is no river

Conclusion

“We can never solve our significant problems from the same level of thinking we were at when we created the problems.”
Albert Einstein

The subject of 1Malaysia is no doubt thought-provoking; it seeks to address unity and equality. The fact of the matter is that 1Malaysia is not a new concept, it has existed since or even before the formation of Principles of the Nation ‘Rukun Negara’ in 1969. It is unfortunate that up to this day this concept has yet to be achieved.

1Malaysia though noble in its aims, is an ambiguous method of reaching the public. It draws a fine line between equality and the rights of the Malays and Malaysians. In a country where inequality of race is reflected in income level, health care, education, land ownership and employment, it is almost absurd to present the notion of 1Malaysia.

A united nation is a confident nation and Malaysia has yet to achieve confidence or trust in each other. One ethnic group or race would evidently cling to its particular set of beliefs, detaching from other ethnic group or race in its values, beliefs and practices. Perhaps it is the lack of sense of belonging and loyalty in a country where finding trustworthy and uncorrupted leaders is difficult.
1Malaysia cannot become a reality unless there a radical rethink of the things which stand in its way; if there is no confidence in a government and the marginalization of minority races is used merely as political leverage without real solution or improvements. There is a need to listen and create dialogue in order to understand and appreciate the plight by listening to the voices of the other races by the Malay-dominated government. When race no longer becomes the criterion, only then will those who are deserving gain. Thus for those who are not up to the standard, would have no choice but to improve themselves. I would like to end with the wise words of Sir Winston Churchill, "However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results."

TV oh TV!

2010-01-31T23:39:00.001-08:00

The most important thing we've learned,
So far as childen are concerned.
Is never, NEVER, NEVER let
Them near you TV set....

IT ROTS THE SENSE IN THE HEAD!
IT KILLS IMAGINATION DEAD!

IT CLOGS AND CLUTTERS UP THE MIND!
IT MAKES A CHILD SO DULL AND BLIND!

HE CAN NO LONGER UNDERSTAND
A FANTASY, A FAIRYLAND!

HIS BRAIN BECOMES AS SOFT AS CHEESE!
HIS POWERS OF THINKING RUST AND FREEZE!

HE CANNOT THINK--HE ONLY SEES!

"All right!'ou'll cry. 'All right!' youll say,
'But if we take the set away,
What shall we do to entartain
Our darling children? Please explain!

Well answer this by asking you,
'What used the darling ones to do?
'How used they keep themselves contented
Before this monster was invented?'

"Have you forgotten, dont you know?
Well say it very LOUD....AND sssslllloooowwww.....

THEY...........USED.........TO..........READ!!!

I talked about this at the conference! Limit TV... its a BAD-BAD one way interaction.....

The kids cant reply back..the TV imagines FOR them.....if you want to let them watch TV,
watch it WITH them, so they can TALK about the show WITH you...

Children who watch too much TV have what they call 'the 2 minute mind'
Because 'pictures' on the screen changes every 2 second...they have problem then to concentrate...

When they read they're mind imagine faaaaarrrr away..as long as they like....THe TV imagine FOR them!!! Bad....Cartoon network in my house is LOCKED!!! only limited amount of TV...bila kecemasan sahaja....

budak yang banyak tengok TV ada masalah membaca...sebab tak boleh concentrate...akibat the two minute mind effect....THAT GOES FOR PS 2,3 and uneducational games too....limit it parents....
best to not even introduce it!
KIDS need to let the energy out DAILY...not weekly or 'bila parents free'..... TV builds all the energy inside them, and they cant let it out...tu pasal bila tutup TV, diorang lompat2, tak leh duduk diam!!!!

TV IS BAD! fullstop! In US there is a strng warning to bann TV for children under 2...and that includes all that MOZART crap that has NO EVIDANCE it increases a childs intelligence...

But more EDUCATIONAL toys and plan activitiesfor hem! NO TV PLEASE!!! :)

....It came from YOU......

2010-01-24T17:16:00.000-08:00

I found something NEW....
how it came about i dont have a clue....
the strength, the spirit, no longer blue.....
I would like to believe it came from YOU....

I believe in giving all ive got,
though little not a whole LOT!

I would like to share with the world....
Even if not as valuable as a pearl...
the ideas and thoughts of this girl....
i hope will cause some kind of twirl....

The twirl comes i hope not for us to drown,
but for us to think and put on a tiny frown,
We plan red but it will end up brown,
the cobweb should never pull us down....

YOu..Ya Allah...give me hope....
You My Lord....even if im in a rope....
My God, i always feel im near a slope....

But i climb that rope, get back on the slope and continue to hope...
Thank you Allah...

-Dina-

Hope.........

2009-12-30T07:57:00.001-08:00

Another 365 days ahead....

If we ever get to count all of it that is...
If ever Allah will give us a chance to correct ourselves.....

If we do no continue to be ignorant and forget what we are here for you see,
If we indeed remember to learn from yesterday's lessons you know......

No i have no new years resolution.....but i have hope....hope for the 10...the 2010...

Hope for myself, my children, my family my life and my country....

Its never too late.....never too late....

the 10 things i hope for in 2010

1. Our Akhlak primarily MINE shall by the grace of Allah be of less flaws.... from my appearance, my choice of words, my faith, my strength saying NO to all the wrong evil whispers that syaitan constantly NON stop-24 hour (like 7-eleven) shoves into my mind..... less ill feelings towards others, more patience, and never to hurt others....Amin

2.To spend more quality time with my beautiful Family and Friends that really make my life worth while living.....

3. To appreciate life more......thank Allah just for the air im breathing, the eyes and mouth and feet and hands and nose and ears and body you let me use for a while...hopefully ill put it to good use..its not my body i know..its on loan...for a while..... thank you for the food, the shelter the love you bless me with.... the little things i,.. we... usually overlook...

4. To help others who need help more...be it animals, plants or humans... save the ailing earth..recycle lah...asingkan sampah....

5. I hope for Malaysia to be safer with crime busting a top priority by authorities....

6. Please oh please i hope for corruption to come to an end...but with the engines and god knows what more missing were gonna rank lower you wait and see says Transparency International....another few notches down.....crazy!

7. I hope Malaysians will be able to get out of debt...and i personally hope to be smarter in managing my finances...

8. Hope the implementing of GST or any stupid taxes will be properly be managed to BENEFIT the already suffering rakyat! (i hear you...yeah right!)

9. sincerely hope the poor and less fortunate get quality health care....like international standard...jealous dengar how the gverment cares for the sick abroad primarily in Australia and New Zealand.... both private and governmental health institutions..my god....issues...issues.... privatization means the best cost more, and the best are only for the rich.... how unfair...unnecessary tests and medication....

The long ques patients have to endure for a 5-10 minute consultation..... the long wait for operations and treatments... the "mistakes" dr's make.... (i know for a fact a case where a boy was WRONGLY diagnosed for cancer!!!! cancer you here....setelah melalui chemotherapy for years...they say oppsss!!!! sorry..salah.... )

i hope a mechanism whereabouts the dr's from the private and government sector can work together.... share resources and experience..... oh dear..... my hopes are endless...but i will continue to do so....

10. I hope the education system will be reviewed as so to be RELEVANT to international standards.......graduate from UNI and you still need training? says it all.... im spending a bomb sending my daughters to a private school coz i really dont trust the standard Malaysian syllables....

and i end this by saying.........."May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions".........

when you have health you have hope...when you have hope you have everything....

continue on hoping.... always hope......

Love to All,

Sincerely...

-Dina-

Saya MElayu....?

2009-12-25T15:26:00.001-08:00

Saya sebenarnya tak tahu saya bangsa apa.... dari kecil saya sangat keliru....

bangsa walaupun memberi kita sedikit refleksi mengenai asal usul dan jati diri... sesuatu bangsa tidak akan berjaya hanya kerana bergantung kepada masa silamnya...benar ianya boleh memberi inspirasi dan semangat, tapi semangat boleh datang dari mana-mana.....

sekiranya bangsa itu tidak mencari ilmu, maka sesuatu bangsa akan menjadi gelap dan jahil. lebih parah lagi jika kejahilan itu tidak disedari. dunia banyak berubah....bangsa berjaya adalah bangsa yang berubah dengan keadaan, bukan menuntut sesuatu hak keistimewaan dan terus mahu bertongkat...tiada bangsa yang akan berjaya jika terus bersikap begitu ... "Ilmulah yang akan menukar nilai pandangan" kata zaid ibrahim..... cari lah ilmu, luaskankan minda dari fikiran sempit selama ini....

tidak saya bukan ahli politik..tetapi minat dengan dunia politik dan kerakusan kuasa sesetangah pihak.... sedih dengan politik perkauman yang sengaja diapi-apikan..... risau dengan rasuah.....kerana anak-anak saya akan membesar di negara ini...

saya bukan menyokong parti A atau B....jadi jangan menilai saya kerana membaca buku ini, saya membaca banyak buku untuk memberi minda saya perspektif dari banyak segi.....

aduhai.....bilalah bangsa ini akan menjadi bangsa yang bermaruah? dilema dari dulu...kini dan janganlah selamanya....

kejayaan yang dikecapi janganlah menggadai maruah dan nilai diri.....

kata zaid yang benar-benar menyentuh - (saya baru mula baca dah sudah begitu terasa....zaid melahirkan rasa kecewanya dengan sangat ikhlas sekali.....)

"Tdak ada jalan mudah dalam hidup ini untuk mencapai kejayaaa. Lebih-lebih lagi kalau kita orang kebanyakkan yang bukan dari golongan ternama atau bangsawan yang sudah ada pangkat. Kejayaan yang dicari mesti lah berasakan kepada keupayaan dan usaha gigih"........

"Kalau melayu mengharai harga diri, mestilah sanggup menolak budaya rasuah atau menjadi 'pak turut' untuk mencari pangkat dan upah"..

zaid menyuru supaya kita mengguna "intelek" untuk berhujah...."{hujah dilawan hujah, kalau dilawan tangan, itu biadap namanya"...gunalah lapangan berdiskusi dengan berhemah mengguna bahasa dan hujah yang munasabah....

untuk menjawab dengan hujah, maka ilmu perlu dicari....

bacalah dan nilailah....anak-anak melayu...bangkitlah....

***im trying to finish the book by tomorrow...ill update my thoughts later*** as if anyones interested .... ;)

sakit

2009-12-24T13:09:00.000-08:00

SAkit....

banyak katogeri...sakit hati, sakit kaki, sakit kulit, sakit mata, sakit perut, sakit mulut, sakit kaki, sakit mati....

anda sakit apa? semua sakit ada ubatnya? cari sampai jumpa....

jangan percayakan dr semata, kadang-kadang diberi ubat entah apa-apa....

kadangkala sakit itu cuma perlukan kita untuk merehat minda dan berjumpa dengan kawan atau keluarga....

sekarang ni saya tengah sakit....banyak lagi sakit yang tak ditulis lagi..ada yang nak tambah?

Memang sakit....saya sakit...terlalu sakit....

siapa ada ubat tolong bagi sikit....tapi sakit saya bukan sikit.... sikt ubat untuk sakit.... sakit yang sudah lama terpendam dalam lubuk jiwa yang paling dalam....

alah...hidup tak lama, jadi padamkan kesakitan..tak pun tahankan aja...lama-lama hilanglah dengan sendiri...cuma takut timbul kembali....

jap eh, nak cari plaster.....budak-budak kalau sakit letak plaster hilang terus....

ill try that then...plaster it all over.....

SENYUMAN SEEKOR IKAN LUMBA-LUMBA

2009-12-18T17:06:00.000-08:00

Ikan lumba-lumba adalah binatang yang amat digemari oleh semua lapisan masyarakat. Mereka bijak dan mampu menceriakan sesiapa sahaja. Ikan lumba-lumba adalah mamalia seperti juga kita manusia. Di kebanyakkan Negara, ikan lumba-lumba dilindungi daripada dieksploitasi dan penyiksaan. Data menunjukkan bahawa sekurang-kurangnya 2’700 ikan lumba-lumba ditangkap dari habitat asal mereka. 53% yang hidup, akan mati dalam masa 90 hari dan setengah dari mereka mati dalam dua tahun pertama akibat terseksa di ‘tempat’ baru, kerana mereka tidak boleh menyusuaikan diri. Kajian menunjukkan bahawa ikan lumba-lumba adalah antara haiwan yang tidak mungkin dapat menyesuaikan diri dalam ‘kurungan’ walau selama mana pun mereka dilatih. NAluri semulajadi mereka adalah di lautan, melompat dan bebas bergerak.

The Dolphins and Sea Lion Show” yang dibawakan oleh LD Sports Sdn Bhd, menampilkan dua ekor ikan lumba-lumba bernama Rio and Karon dan sepasang singa laut bernama Gendon and Brad menunjukkan bagaimana Malaysia dan rakyatnya tidak sentsitif langsung mengenai hak dan isu eksploitasi binatang. Saya merasa dukacita mereka dibenarkan dibawa masuk ke Negara ini. Binatang-binatang ini akan diusung dari Kuala Lumpur kemudian ke Penang dan Johor selama tiga bulan berturut-turut. Cubalah bayangkan bagaimana siksanya mereka terpaksa diangkat kesana kemari hanya kerana ingin memberi “hiburan” kepada manusia.

Rio and Karon dipaksa melakukan tiga pertunjukkan satu hari pada hari biasa dan sehingga lima pertunjukkan sehari pada hari Sabtu dan Ahad! Bayangkanlah betapa penatnya mereka. Sudahlah mereka dikurung dalam penjara buatan manusia. Jika kita pun disuruh bekerja melakukan sesuatu yang tidak sepatutnya, pasti ada perasaan derita di hati bukan? Sekurang-kurangnya kita dibayar gaji dan tidak dikurung dalam ‘penjara’. Mamalia ini Cuma diberi makan ikan mati, yang tidak pun mereka gemari! Diet ikan lumba-lumba, adalah ikan hidup yang segar!

Binatang ini juga punyai perasaan. Sayangnya perasaan ikan lumba-lumab tidak mampu dizahirkan di wajah mereka. Hakikatnya otot di muka ikan lumba-lumba tidak boleh bergerak, oleh sebab itu, sedih atau takut, sakit atau sihat, mereka akan kelihatan sepert ‘tersenyum’ sentiasa.

Persembahan singa laut dan ikan lumba-lumba ini tidak member secebis pun maklumat atau pengajaran berguna kepada penonton yang hadir, yang rata-ratanya terdiri dari golongan anak-anak. Tidak ada sedikit pun cerita mengenai binatang ini, dari mana asalnya, bagaimana habitatnya, apa yang mereka gemari? Mesej yang diberikan kepada penonton adalah – “Tidak mengapa kita bersuka ria, dan bertepuk tangan. Tidak salah kita menangkap ikan lumba-lumba ini dan memaksa mereka menghiburkan kita. Melayan binatang seperti objek hiburan adalah perbuatan yang boleh diterima”. Music yang kuat dan pengacara yang menjengkelkan membuatkan saya merasa begitu simpati sekali kepada haiwan-haiwan ini.

Di akhir pertunjukkan, puluhan manusia akan beratur panjang untuk mengambil gambar dengan ikan lumba-lumba ini dan dikenakan caj tambahan RM15. Ikan lumba-lumba tidak suka disentuh oleh begitu ramai orang! memegang ikan lumba-lumba dengan sesuka hati, menyebabkan mereka merasa tekanan yang amat dahsyat. Tekanan ini menebabkan usus dalaman mereka rosak dan ini boleh membawa kepada kematian.

Tempat ‘tinggal’ Ria dan Karon terlalu kecil pada pandangan saya. Ikan lumba-lumba di lautan menyelam sehingga 150 kaki dan melompat serta berenang beratus-ratus kilometer jauhnya. ‘Penjara’ ini cuma 2.5 meter dalam, saya seperti mahu mengalirkan air mata. Menurut pekerja yan bertugas “sangkar” singa laut lebh kecil lagi. Cara binatang ini dieksploitasi, menunjukkan bahawa manusia sememangnya sangat tamak dan tidak berperikemanusiaan. Haiwan ini dikerah bekerja bagi segelintir untuk mendapat pulangan. Jika Malaysia mahu mencapai status Negara maju, pertunjukkan sebegini sepatututnya tidak dibenarkan dan diharamkan di Negara ini. Saya pasti negara-negara maju tidak akan membenarkan pertunjukkan yang jelas menyeksa binatang-binatang ini masuk ke dalam Negara mereka. Saya lebih terkejut lagi apabila melihat logo Tourism Malaysia tertera di kain rentang pertunjukkan ini, walhal hakikatnya Tourism Malaysia tidak pernah pun bekerjasama dengan penganjur. Bagaimana mereka dengan sesuka hati boleh meletakkan logo Tourism Malaysia tanpa kebenaran. Dan siapakah yang membenarkan pertunujkkan ini masuk ke Malaysia?

Bukalah mata anda semua, bersuaralah dan hentikanlah kekejaman ini! Ikan lumba-lumba ini sepatutnya bebas berenang di lautan bersama keluarga mereka! Saya pasti Malaysia, kerajaan, wakil rakyat, NGO dan rakyatnya peka kepada nasib malang binatang-binatang ini.

INI SURAT SAYA KEPADA AKHBAR-AKHBAR DALAM BAHASA MELAYU....

SAYA NAK TAMBAH LAGI BEBERAPA ISI PENTING....

RIA DAN KARON TELAH DICULIK DARI LAUT JAWA....fakta yang menyedihkan ialah, apabila seekor dolphin diambil dari 'ahli keluarganya' - sekurang-kurangnya seekor ahli yang lain akan mati akibat kesedihan...mereka binatang yang sangat rapat dengan keluarga....

mereka juga mempunyai kulit yang sangat sensitif..apabila dipaksa melompat, bukan shaja usus dalaman mereka pecah dan rosak.... malah kulit mereka sakit

mereka akan mengalami stress yang amat dahsyat secara fizikal dan mental apabila dipaksa hidup dalam penjara buatan manusia, mereka juga akan hilang antara anugerah paling berharga iaitu "eco location". Kerana tiada ikan hidup, hanya dinding konkirt dan air klorin yang amat tidak sihat untuk mereka.

dolphin berkomunikasi dengan sonar....apabila dikurung di satu tempat yang kecil, sonar akan terpantul pada muka dinding dan dipantulkan semula kepada dolphin tersebut, ianya sangat menyeksa dolphin itu.....sakit sebab berdengung-dengung...

SEDIHNYA apabila doplhin dan singa laut ini dibawa ke merata dunia dan KE NEGARA-NEGARA ISLAM seerti syiria, jeddah...dan juga ke negara membangun thailand, vetnam, philiphines....DAN MALAYSIA ....negara maju takkan bagi masuk!!! jelas menganya binatang

saya tidak dapat tidur malam...i have to do something!!! not just sit and be sorry!

sedih bila tengok rakyat malaysia bertepuk-tepuk tangan gembira...cluless and oblivious!!!! SICKENING to the bone!

Whispers through the Air

2009-12-06T18:48:00.000-08:00

i cant be the one....
whos going to ask around.....

dont ask me why...
though i could try to justify...

not to you really..
explaining to myself merely....

silly...silly....
that will always be me...
try to compose and be merry...
merry i am...and really happy...

happy i will be even more,
if things be as they were before....

a substitute just wouldnt do,
couldnt find the connection between the two....

it comes it goes...
it disappears and it glows....

always will be there...
no matter how, when or where....

even though not there...
i dont dispare.

i still feel the whispers....
as if your lips close to my ear....

i keep on going....
coz even though not there...
you send me magic and courage through the air......

-dina-

Lipstick....

2009-11-29T07:26:00.000-08:00

i want a new lipstick...
i want a clock that's antic....
i want to paint something artistic.....
but maybe just a lipstick that's oh so fantastic....

WAIT!!! or a new bag thats authentic.....??

i hate all the politics....
what? u said its democratic???
to me its just so,so problematic....
and people get incredibly pathetic....

i need a little kick....
but nothing too drastic...
something that is therapeutic...
like reading something poetic.....

dont be sympathetic..
coz im not going to be apologetic...
i like people who are sarcastic...
but please dont try any slapstick...
and stay away from me plastic!

what oh what do i need really?

i sound lunatic?
i would like to believe its instead exotic...:)

i know you like it...
just dont get too frantic...

Now i know what i need....

dont mean to be too simplistic...

but what i need....IS....

just a nice new bright red lipstick...
that will be just oh so fantastic!!!

:)))

-dina-

Penat

2009-11-29T05:08:00.000-08:00

penatlah...im just sooo penat when things stay stagnant...

for an exciting adventurous soul like myself...its killing me...
when things dont change and people are complacent i cringe...

you dont get it do you.... things wont change if YOU dont change!
Change is never easy...so please get out from that ridiculous comfort zone and go and do something!!!

Saya dah penat...penat menunggu

its hard to go through things and do it alone.........

How, now brown cow?

2009-11-29T04:38:00.000-08:00

im loathing something,
It keeps on ringing...
It keeps on occurring,
It keeps on showing....

Its not shining,
its just damn irritating....

Im missing and wishing,
for that something,
yet i know it never aint happening....

What do i do?
Just keep on wondering,
Have got to keep on praying,
Have to go on changing....

i dont like hammering....
nor do i like stomping...
but i got to keep on drilling....
otherwise ill keep on sighing....

its so, so , so difficult...
the choices i made brings insult...
i actually just need result....
i know who just to consult.........

so here i go again....
go cracking my brain.......
im missing the rain....
and i feel the strain...

here's what i live by....
"no pain no gain".......

so let me try to gain...but i feel too much pain....

-dina-

FLY or FLY......?

2009-11-17T15:08:00.000-08:00

theres just too many things to do.....

im not looking back....
So dont take me of track....
im smashing the potions of the rack....
it fell down with a smack....

leaves turning dry,
i look up to the sky,
i let go a sigh,
then started to cry.....

but im not looking back,
so dont take me of track.....
though i feel all black,
i refuse to crack.....

i shall make myself high,
i will try and try.....
till i reach the sky...
soar up there and just fly................

-dina-

My Path and Past.....

2009-11-14T14:31:00.000-08:00

I am writing this entry after solat subuh...i just felt the urge to write....

...i just need to let it out....

the path... it was bumpy, windy and memorable at the same time....

oh dear Imrans awake...i have to go.... plus i have one paper this morning at 9am...

ill finish this entry...later...promise.....

just ponder upon this for a second "most people attempt something before they give it up....but yo have already define your limits by testing them..."

i have to give it up...yet there's a part of me that shrinks into a small ball when i even think about it.....

wish you all the best...i wish myself too.... till then everyne....

MEN! I ove em.....

2009-11-10T20:34:00.000-08:00

Imran….my boy… I never knew how to handle a BOY…. I love girls…. But IMRAN we….saya dan suami selalu berkata ?(ceh lupa nak tulis dalam BM)….ok…. Imran satu anugerah buat kami. Memang tak pernah dijangka, tidak dirancang tidak diduga….
Anak-anak…anugerah dan AMNAH…ramai yang lupa… amanah ini terlalu berat…. Bukan untuk diberi makan, minum dan pakaian sahaja…. Bukan diberi tugas mendidik pada guru dan ajaran feqah dan tauhid pada uztaz semata….

Siapa yang bertanggungjawab? Kenapa selalu ibu dan isteri? Memang benar….peranan ibu sangat besar… ramai yang saya lihat tungng langgang, perngai nya tak seberapa tu sebab tak rapat dgn ibu…atau ibu mereka ada masalah… TETAPI… tugas yang utama saya berikan kepada BAPA…. Bapa bertanggungjawab menjadi nakoda….”Peliharalah dirimu dan keluarga mu dari API neraka”….

Sabda Rasulullah “Dan lelaki adalah pemimpin keluarganya dan dia AKAN DISOAL mengenai kepimpinannya”..Allah tak soal kita wanita…. Hadith by Bukhari….

Bapa entah kemana….dilepas ‘beban’ mendidik pada isteri…bapa sibuk mencari rezeki…TAPI..knock2….isteri pun sama ok? …maslahnya kajian menunjukkan ramai lelaki di penjara kerana maslah membesar tanpa ayah…ramai wanita bohsia…kerana tidak rapat dengan bapa…..buat bapa yg ada anak remaja perempuan..tolonglah go on a date with them…puji anak gadis anda…. Bina hubngan supaya anak lelaki anda percayakan anda…its all about trust….dia tak percaya, budak2 ni tak akan cakap dgn kita….

Anak perlu diajar solat….macamana nak solat bila mak bapak tak solat….asyik kejar akademik semata…soalt nya tak pernah nak amik kira….soalt is CRUCIAL…tiang agama..ramai sangat orang melayu islam tak soalt sekarang ni…scary….

Orang lelaki merempit, meragut, yang di serenti lelaki….yang di university….?? Yup, 60-70% WO…MEN..wanita….Anak lelaki kini ramai yang malas dan tidak bermotivasi…bapak lepak kedai mamak…isteri jual sayur di pasar…dari dulu lagi kita dah perhati senario begini… ingat saja gambaran wanita-wanita di pasar KOTA BAHRU Kelantan…dari dulu lagi gitulah….

Bukan nak menghentam lelaki ok…I love the men in my life.. silapnya bila kita selalu kata anak lelaki “boleh jaga diri sendiri”…. Buku Cool Boys Super Sons” by Jamilah Samian adalah buku yg sangat elok untuk dibaca bagi mereka yg ada anak lelaki…sekarang dah ada dalam BM…dkt MPH ada….. pada ibu bapa yg kurang beri perhatian pada anak….sudah masanya berubah….kata Jamilah kita kena ingat ni betul-betul..

“Good behavior is NOT about obedience…its about DOING and STAYING AWAY”…. from bad things that is….

Kita jangan mengukur baik anak pada mereka yg mendengar kata..tapi jika boleh berkata Tidak pada benda yg tak baik… itulah “perangai yg elok” sebenarnya…. Kita harus benarkan anak2 menyoal dan bertanya kepada kita…jangan kata anak menjawab pula….

Semalam sempat dengar Tun Mahathir punya talk untuk Gender Series talk untuk NAM Institute for Empowermant of Women… NIEW at Mariot…Tun said the same thing…. Women..theyre acquiring more knowledge..theyre willing to face challenges..

Men..u guys just need to buckle up… I want my Imran to be “that men I adore…” ceh Natalie Imbruglia pulak…. Oh Imran….what and who will u be…. I shall wait and see…Imran Arrazi…maybe ull learn to love and know Ar-Razi and may HE indeed be your inspiration….a muslim scholar… with iman and knowledge dear…..

BTW…its Imrans 1st bday today!!!! Ummi loves you sayang….so very much!

Miror...mirror...on the .....

2009-11-10T00:45:00.000-08:00

FAT...Mirror mirror..... THAT CANT BE ME!

yes, seperti mana wanita lain i AM obsessed with my body image....WHY? Why you ask?
Is it because i AM not confident with myself? no....not relly....i love ME....the complicated, me.....Is it because of the images in VOGUE and of Angelina Jolie despite having 3 kids looking damn good....

Is it because when youre FAT...and when your hips widen up you look horrible....susah nak cari baju...jeles dengan wanita lain yang slim??? The answers to thse questons are YES...!!! YE...BETUL...Na'am..... dengan ini saya sesungguhnya mengaku....

Now, now....IF youre comfortable with who you are and youre okay being overweight..... i salute you.... betul..its what you have to offer and who you are that matters most..BUT........

Im not....not comfortable... i have issues.... so what do you do? DIETLAH..apa lagi....persalannya kenapa diet selalu tak menjadi? Sebab kita CRASH diet...hari ni tak makan, esok makan.... Let me list the errors i see myself making....

1st - TAK CONSISTENT! Jap diet, jap tidak! Diet buang karbo...comlex carbs...yg putih2....BUANG...jangan makan! Buang chips, junk food..... and kuih muih!!!

2nd)- air tak minum! KENA minum air putih SAHAJA!!!!!! 2 botol mineral water setiap hari....untuk memudahkan pembuangan toxin DAN lemak!!! Tak leh minum kopi dan teh dan air BERGULA!

3 - TAk excersice...its 70% det 30% excersice....thats the rule! Tak leh lari.... kena excesrsice SETIAP HARI!!!! i usually excersice.... dah lama tak excersice, sebab tu yg down tu...alasan? tak de masa? CARI MASALAH!!! yes excersice is crucial for the MIND too...helps you sleeps better...bagus untuk orang-orang depressed....huhu...bukan saja badan cantik, trim, tapi sebab excercise releases endorphines..... which are chemicals produced by the neurons....communicating through the synapses.... synapses ..the synapes is the area where neourons meet..tapi dont touch each other...(wah...amazing tuh...)it just realesses chemicals..known as nerotransmitters ... okaaaayyyy..... what the??? masa sekolah tak amik bio....add maths amik....tapi result JANGN tanya, haha...ni tgh belajar bio...best ya ampun!!! so endorphines ni salah satu chemical tuh la....mcm jugak serotonin.... it gives the 'feel good' factor to you....banyak lagi mcm types of neurotransmitters macam acetylcholine (antara yg femes).... dopamine.... FINE! tu yang drugs dicipta....they are made to mimic nerotransmitters so boleh membantu menambah atau mengurangkan apa yang perlu dengan 'memutar belitkan' process transmisi synaptic ni.... oh FINE!

oh yes...nak loose weight...ikhwan pun malas dengar i membebel pasal brains and neourans and the CNS nih...sian driku ini! Tak pe...tak pe..habis satu dinding i tampal...haha...

4 - Makanan sedap tak tahan!!!!!!!!!

fine! im not giving up!!!

tapi cuba tengok gambar tu.... macam masa anak dara dulu lagi chubby je.... kan...???? NOPE..im serious...kurus macam angelina jolie..... sebelum 1 januari 2010! So new year resolution SHALL NOT include loosing weight ok?

haha...wish me luck!!! Whoose with me....?

One day.....

2009-11-02T23:16:00.000-08:00

The dream..... of paradise.....the meticulous details... the splendor of the spaces...the rich history....the genious of islamic architecture.... everything to represent the One.... the Illa-llah... the doctrine of tawhid... there is an intimate connection between faith and asthetics in Islam. Its the desire to give aesthtic expression to the proclamation of La ilaha-illa-llah...... How?

I studied this....and its beautiful...makes me want to cry.... for Islam is trully, wonderfully beautiful.

Islamic Architecture in form, design AND spirit is inspired by just that..... the tawhid of One.... its the embodiment of the Islamic principles and its values or thats what it should be....

The avoidence of naturalism, or charecterisation made the Muslims think ahead into more creative 'designers', builders, crastmn and of course architects......

"For every Muslim, the asthetic realm, the beautiful, is that which directs attention to God.....it is not symbolic truths of nature. Instead, the beautiful, for the Muslim, is that which stimulates the viewer or listener as intuition of, or an insight into, the nature of transendence....- the late Dr Lamya Al Faruqi-

One of the most striking features of Islamic Architecture is the focus on the enclosed space, for Islam emphases what is important is the internalization of faith not its external manifestations........The enclosed space SHOULD be the most important element....The facade should tell us just a little abut the building...but when u step inside...when penetrated and entered...you experience it from within....MasyaAllah....- the concept of this 'hidden architecture'..... should be grasped into our lives and souls as well.....

important fact there...just imagine the dome.... from a distance its nothing...just a structure but when you look at it from the inside.....as you get closer...it sinks into mazes of cupolas, arabesques....calliagraphy... have you ever thought of that....just pure beauty!

its just a place i wish to step foot one day...i believe it will inspire me....i would love to share it with someone who shares the dream......

.....you.......

2009-11-02T06:41:00.000-08:00

I just want ...............
Being around.........
Smiling with..........
Sipping, drinking, talking and laughing.....

Crying, Sharing, Thinking with......
Inspiration and dreams....
Share it with.........

Stay with me,
Hold my hand.....

Dream with me....
to....
Never Land........

ps/ brighten up my day...show me the way....
so much in me i just want to say.....under the moon... i wish to stay.... but the silence.... it doesnt make my day.... ill just continue to pray, that this feeling.... wont ever stay? Or maybe one day...... My skies will no longer be gray....:)

Yet Another......

2009-11-02T05:38:00.000-08:00

Nothing is more dangerous than an idea when it is the only one you have.
Emile Chartier

people say i dream too much, too many ideas.... so many things i want to do...... all i have to say is LET ME DO IT..if you cant and wont support me then..... just you know, keep quiet..... dont bring me down and trample on my spirit...coz if you do, knowing me ill just get back up again.....

I fall 7 times ill just get back 8....

i know.... And to everyone reading...... heres what i have to share tonite.....

“Courage is the discovery that you may not win, and trying when you know you can lose.”

“Enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity.”

“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.”

Good Night then....

Kit Kat...i had two bars today.....

2009-10-29T02:12:00.000-07:00

It was horrid.... horrible.... being overwhelmed, lost, unmotivated and depressed.....

My goodness..... i hated every inch and second of it.... but i apreciate what came out of it. It MADE me think, restructure, organize and clear things....nope belum habis...banyak lagi kena buat..its still there. The to do list is very long mind you....

Oh why do i have this boundless energy and ideas in me? Its very tiring.... no its not about being ungrateful.... because i am...3 wonderful kids, a marriage that actually works, a job not everyone can get...(many can do i pessume), wonderful friends and family, enough to eat (a little more than enough), my faith still intact... i realize this....

(im actually taking a break from my assignment, penat perah otak...relax jap k)

Ok... i dont really expect you to read, but if you find my ramblings of any use...please by all means...just dont judge and criticize (wait...people do that unintentionally and automatically so go ahead, just keep it to yourself....but people like talking about other beings..it gives them pleasure and a sense of comfort....so what the heck...go ahead)

Comfort? Yes the comfort zone.... get out of it! Its bad...your hips get larger.... go prickle your life with struggles and uncertaintie like me..... and get frustreated if things dont work out later....OR just stay there.... dont change...dont strugle and live a life of peace and harmony!!!

do the same thing over and over....get the same results...just dont complain. Im young...im ambitious...just let it be..ill mellow down at 40....!

:) gtg and string words together...anyone wanna help?

i know......siapa suruh baca?

Just Take Care ok everbody...and dont be nasty nor naughty.... wait...you get it.....

-Dina-

2009-10-15T06:16:00.000-07:00

I somehow find peace and think well while driving.... my mind wanders off, in out and about ... traffic jams better.... coz then i think about so many things... thats how hectic life is in KL....masa nak contemplate pun tak ada. Wait, thats because i have 3 kids.....now i think well when driving ALONE....terlupa nak selit pulak...Theres no time to sit and reflect sebab dari subuh ke isyak adaaaa jee benda nak buat...... jadi bila memandu, itulah masanya segala apa yang hendak dan patut dibuat terpancar dan menyala-nyala....dengan laju....

Laju...my mind laju.....tapi hari tu....blank...i went blank on air!!! i was like a zombie....that was the effect of stress mind you...(my fren kata, DIna even OPrah has her bad days...) thanks...a lot for trying...but.....oprah does have a good team...a really good team to cover her up...

so, my mind jumps from one thing to another with a snap of a finger.... you know some people are soo organized....semua benda kena tulis.... well technically, phsysicaly yes...the house, the cupboards....but my life? the to do list...and everythings all over...and then i add things to my plate.... my friend said..."thats the problem with you Dina...you dont know what you want".....dari dulu lagi...

Well, we dont HAVE to know what we want kan? jap....jump back to all over...its like bilik professor yang bersepah dan berterabur....JANGAN bersihkan...walaupun berterabur i know where everything is.... if i ever try to be that composed little lady....its not me...when its not me....its dead boring.....

but yes a little cleaning up wuld do good...haha there i go again.... ok to something that has been in mind among others....

Of Iraq and Afganistan and how stupid and helpless we are.... i have always been following the world news, maybe.... to a certain degree Abi influnced this fascination with 'other people and other matters in other countries that has nothing to do with you at all' ... i hate the thought that we are sometime to cooped up in our own litle world, hung up with our own litle views ... masa kecik2 dulu....pagi-pagi when we rush opur parents room, the litle grey radio will blast with BBC news....dulu tak ada Astro... so yes our parents habits do to a certain degree effect us..... and then theres that other habit that i just wont share..... i hear you mas....just shut the door!

Ok.....tadi ternampak dekat berita macamana Obama dok justify perang kat Afgan....kununnya sebab....US memang kena proceed with this war supaya mereka tak akan 'terkena' lagi serangan seperti 9/1...

Haloooooo......knock kncok...whos there...obama? obama who? o......ba ru menag nobel prize tapi hantar lagi tentera kat afgan.....mr obama sir with all due respect....serangan 9/11 telah dirancang di German dan Spain.....dan dilakukan oleh oarng dari Saudi.... berpusat di US sebab marah dengan dasar US yang dok mengipas Israel....

Taliban tak tahu menahu...yang dok bagi duit kat Taliban bukan Us ke......

I have to tke a break....coz my baby is crying and the bigger baby is leaving for Jakarta....let me pack his bags.....

Till then...

WSF 268

think thats a nice number people???

Steal the heart......Safe guard It.....

2009-10-12T05:30:00.000-07:00

Some people make their goals the stars,
They may live and die never reaching them,
but in the darkness of the night, those stars will guide them to their destination,
because they put them in their sights.

I might never reach my star.... i might never feel its qualities and properties in this palm of mind....i can only imagine...the brightness....the glow, the heat.... but i can see it.... and its guiding me... and at times it is dark.... but that shiny sparkle from the star i see..... from people around me keeps me going...... ok.... im doing that again..... rambling to nowhere.... thats just me.. and i love that in me...it makes me ...ME.....

lets take a look at this quote below.....

The only lasting beauty is the beauty of the heart
- Jalaluddin al-Rumi

I deliberately opened up Purification of Heart again.... Its a book i keep at my study table so i can easily reach it, when i feel the heart needs to be purified again.....when i need my heart to be sound again.....

If the heart is sound our actions will be sound....we need to work on our hearts...society needs to work to mend hearts which are filled with diseases.... like other disesases it is treatable...but first we have to recognize the signs and symptoms.... and then we need to treat it...

Says Hamza Yusoff...but just like medicinal prescriptions, the physician cant force you to take it...no one can force u to swallow it down....

"The heart is designed to be in a state of calm.....which is achieve with the remembrance of God. This calm is what the heart seeks out and gravitates to. The heart yearns for it...."

"BUt when God is not remembered, when human beings forget God, then the heart falls into a state of agitation and turmoil. In this state it becomes vulnerable to diseases because it is undernourished and cut off. Cell requires oxygen, so we breathe. If we stop breathing we die. THe heart also needs to breathe, and the breath of the heart is none other then the remembrance of God"

A sick heart needs nourishment.....Heedlessness starves the heart, robs it of its spiritual manna. WHen people are completely immerse in the material world, believing that this world is all that matters and all that exists and that they are NOT accountable for their actions, they effect a spiritual death of their hearts"

Wrongdoings irritates the heart....i feel that...and whenever i do i jump up again..... i just pray for the strength..and no one can give it to me except for Allah.

The heart is so incredible.... it beats 100000 times a day....it pumps 2 gallons of blood per minute and over 100 gallons per hour....that IS an exhausting task...... the heart does this even before the brain is formed.....the heart was created first.....

Listen to your heart and not your ego. Your ego prompts you to boast of vain assertions to obtain the glory of this world. Turn away from vanity and seek Him in the recesses of your heart and soul

-Sheikh Abdul Qadir Jillani
[Fayuz E Yazdani]

Lately ive been questioning why things happen the way they did...why me i ask.... at a point of time i actually feel i dont deserve it..... but this attitude is a denial of God's qadar....but should we be happy when bad things befalls us?

God knows whats best for you.We cant choose what befalls us yes.....some are inevitable true.....The prophet went through worse....he never met his parents, hes beloved wife died...so did most of his children..... he was called a madman, a liar, people threw stones at him until he bled...whats that compared to our life? That should always put us back on track again.

..... the response is patience...a beautiful patience, a skill i have yet to master....

God is testing me....., but it is His will and there is wisdom in it.....

Its not that bad i say.........i can still smile and play.....

Alhamdulillah...

LOve,
WSF

Warning...this entry does not make sense...:)

2009-10-06T00:53:00.000-07:00

Its tough...... yes it is.....its life.....
Some get it easy...... some dont...some wants it easy......some just complicate theirs....some keep it simple....some just dont care...some throw theirs down the drain...some...some just let it be...just let days pass......wasting it away..... like old dry leaves.... wrinkled creased, crisp and craggy.....

Theres decisions and then theres actions ....
Theres implications and then theres causation....
Theres things you just want to do...but never get to do.....
And then theres things you dont want to do but .....just do...coz err....u have too??

its not about wanting...its about doing what needs to be done.....
i dont make sense do i.... nevermind...i rarely do..... tu yang mengacara macam budak sekolah tu....

Ada tak orang baca artikel dalam utusan hari tu?
now,now...yes im not the best.... i make mistakes..... i have my moods...sometimes theres so much problems that although i try to hide it on air..nampak jugak kecelaruan tu....

I try though... tapi komen2 yang clearly sebab dengki dan iri hati tak patut disiarkan.... i would think if im a datin or married to someone yang kaya raya, ada pangkat....mesti tak keluar surat mcm tu...

Manusia.....lagi2 kat Malaysia (sebab kat Aussie, serious tak ada penyakit gila gelaran dan harta serta kereta macam ni) if you dont have the money, you dont have the contacts (i rarely send hampers to reporters and meet them nowdays, in fact i never do...theres the problem maybe.....) then they think they can trample on you..... except those who actualy know me, sat down with me.... but i dont have the luxury......

i would and will try to improve...but dont bring me down sebab sakit hati...dengki atau iri hati.. read hamza yusofs purification of the heart.....! WOuld do u, me and all of us some good....... im reading it again now! But wait..... i have my thick textbooks to read...! arghhh so little time....so many things to do.... time management..........any experts out there? coz im seriously desperately need to regulate my time.....

anyway, anyhow.....a scholar once said...dont run away and shun your enemies...for its them who will tell you the truth..... so listen to them.... and i should and shall do just that...thank you....

Yes the world is round.......round...rolling..... so is life.....
the pins knocked by the heavy rolling ball.....
If yours go into the drain..... try again.....

Di Bawah Sini, Di Aussie

2009-09-27T21:57:00.000-07:00

Im having a holiday....well technically coz im Over the Sea.... but it isnt really a hoidaly..."holiday" coz definition of a holiday to me is where 'a person and someone'...relaxes....have fun.... its calm, peacfull and tranquill...then we take pictures, look at buildings... stays in a suite....me? Im changing diapers....feeding kids, cooking, doing the laundry, screaming, crying, merajuking, very-very tiring... strain...hectic......

I didnt remember feeling this stressed out last trip down under...oh yeah coz i had only 2!!! Kids i ean......and 7 kids in a house...in the plane? Cuba bayangkan....8 jam dalam flight.....nasib badan lah yg dok kiri kanan kita....the "Mat Sall" next to us...actually yelled "STOP IT" to Imran....! Can you believe it..... And Imran wasnt even crying! He was trying to talk with his cute baby talk!!!! Mana la budak tu nak paham?.....ada ke suruh baby diam? Mat Salleh wahai Mat Salleh, macam lah dunia ni hak dia dan budak2 tak ada hak..... Oppps ...yg half Mat Salleh macam saya? Ok lagi kot..... huhu

Anyway, aside from the daily domestic hectic scedulle and duties....nasib baik Clean-freak Mas ada....so everyone takes turns to wash endless dishes.....coz hey in Aussie no maid ok..... my husband...mas's husband, kak ah, abang....i mean semua kena chip in..... It was a good one gathering with family.... eating cookies ditching my diet! gaining weight.... cuma travelling with Imran is extremely dificult, kesian dia penat.... tak cukup tidur....

I think next trip wherever that maybe.... kena tunggu budak2 besar sikit..... saya teringin nak berjalan menggembara sorang diri ......ke serata benua..... boleh tak? err....yes ajak husband sekali....(takut dia baca entry ni)...:) ....balik ni saya kena diet balik...gym menanti, TV..... dan kehidupan perlu diteruskan...i just love Ausrtralia...Allgester...in Queensland as im writting in the garage turned into a play area.... the wind blowing.....cold, dry and so relaxing...everythings so laid back here.... wishing...just wishing for so many hings...but wishing without trying is wishing in vain.... so lets wish and try our best to "let-the-thing-you-wish" for come true......

god! some people are so lucky to be born wth a silver spoon..... i dont want to go back...yet my life is there, in Malaysia now...but can run away or not?

Pagi esok jam 3 am akan bertolak dari Mt Daguler Crest, Allgester ke Gold Coast untuk balik ke KL....... Welkome home i whisper to myselfe...be good to me please.....

WSF

Kembara

2009-08-17T07:02:00.000-07:00

Ive always admired Dr Asri Zainul Abidin.... he's words, his thoughts, his opinions on matters, on religion, in politics, in life and just the way he views and put words together...

Thank you for being 'you' Dr...we need more people like you around... i wish to be if not equal (err i dont think ever for now....) well, .at least somewhat of a bit of a person you are..... like maybe sikit sangat2 je pun jadi........ plan and plan and read and learn and yearn.....

Ok...ok..enough...tapi artikel Dr Asri pada 16 Ogod di Utusan Malaysia beanr-benar memberi saya inspirasi..... kenapa? kerana ianya begitu jujur sekali..... bukanlah sebelum ini ia tak jujur, kadangkala techniqal sangat so sometimes ill skip the para......and go right to the conclusion....this article, adalah mengenai pandangan Dr mengenai hidup yang kita SEMUA boleh jadikan iktibar dan renung-renungkan..... It made me stop and ponder... yeah i do that often and do that all the time.....

Dr berada di Lampeter ketika menulis artikel itu...samalah Dr, saya juga cuma dapat berdoa supaya satu hari dapatlah saya menjejakkan kaki dan belajar serta mengembara ke sana suatu hari nanti.....Dr sudah termakbul dua'nya....saya? Mana tau....siapa tahu.....well, not to Lampeter per say...but just study, live and learn in the UK....it has always been a dream... for when we explore the world...we learn to adapt and change our world views and we open up our minds and we strive to understand things or people or 'other-different ways' of doing things...of seeing things....of 'experiencing' the moment and 'feel' and touch..... its just the people i want to meet, the great minds i would like to talk with and exchange ideas with...i want to see what they do, HOW they do it......

"Hari berganti, manusia berubah kedudukan, keadaan dan berbagai lagi. Allah mengubah iklim dan warnai hidup kita dengan berbagai cara. Kesemua itu menerusui dalam perjalanan kehidupan dunia. Maka kita pun sedar, kita adalah kembara yang merentasi benua kehidupan untuk sampai ke satu perhentian yang bernama 'kematian'"

"Hidup ini bagaikan lautan yang luas. Kita hanyalah perahu kecil yang sedang menongkah gelombang. Lihatlah betapa ramai yang 'gah' dengan kedudukan dan jawatan mereka semalam, hari ini tiada lagi kemegahan itu. Siapa yang dapat memastikan hari esok membawa bahagia kepadanya? Sebagai muslim, untuk merentasi benua kehidupan ini, tiada lain yang dapat kita bertaut meainkan at-tawakkal 'ala Allah ata bergantung harapan pada Allah. JIwa apabila benar-benar bergantung harapan kepada Allah, keajaiban hidup akan berlaku tanpa diduga" nak menagis baca okay...???

i loved this quote Dr Asri made from Abu Firas al-'Amiri a poet known as Majd al-'Arab ;-

"Berpisahlah nescaya kaudapat ganti orang yang kau tinggalkan. Menggembaralah di bumi nescaya temui petunjuk dalam perjalanan itu. Singa jika tidak meninggalakan hutannya tidak akan garang. Anak panah jika tidak meninggalkan busarnya tidak akan mengena sasaran" - Man, how do people know which book to read......beautiful ey? Arghhhh... nothing is more beautiful than a written word...

People change when they travel.., it will leave a mark, a memory, we learn a thing or two...or some may learn none maybe......if they're intention to travel is only to have FUN and SHOP...how shallow some are...but hey, we come in different packages, we all say......

Imam al-Syafie changed many of his fatwa's when visiting Iraq..also when he saw new things in Eygpt...

We need to change for its vital for our survival..yes indeed..change its not ever easy and can be really scary....but its a necesity... however having said that, we never ever 'change' our Islamic principles...it just grows and we develop further understandings and appreciate different interpretations by different people....

"Hidup adalah kembara. Semua kita pasti akan sampai ke satu destinasi yang bernama kematian. Cumanya dalam kembara di benua yang luas ini, setiap kita melalui denai, lurah, lorong, lembah, jalan dan dataran yang tak mungkin sama. Namun perhentiannya satu, kita akan Menghadap Tuhan yang Maha Adil. Perjalanan pasti akan berakhir. Cuma yang kita rungsingkan adalah bagaimana ianya akan berakhir. - my god, i question that constantly...about almost everything..but this next sentence...... made it crystal bohemian glass clear.... - "namun tiada yang lebih indah daripada perasaan bergantung harap kepada Allah. Benua kehidupan terlalu luas dan menakutkan. Banyak kejahatan dan juga kebaikan. Moga Allah selamatkan kita sema dalam meneruskan kembara hidup."

Lovely Dr....thanks!

Nite! i soooo need to finish my novel and book...and mummy diary..... arghhhhhh! Endless responsibilities....

but as long as we remain calm, serene, collected and focused, we will see how easy it is to get through....i have to repeat this like every day when i start to fluster and get kelam kabut....

its just that - sometimes were the statue and sometimes were the pigeon indeed...i would prefer to be a gull though...wait maybe a dove...urgh..... :))

Love.....
WSF

Frankly....its Franky and its Creepy.....

2009-08-16T07:06:00.000-07:00

Mary Shelly's Frankestein....

I dont know why tapi saya teringat sangat dekat Frankenstein..... one of the most famous horror stories of all time...... an epic love story, a study of human relationships, ambition and pride the story also deals with science and was set in the 1700's - the age of enlightenment and reason...... go figure...brilliant this Mary Shelly seorang Romantis.... i likeeee.....

full of parallel, contrast and ironies...gosh sounds seriously like my life...maybe yours too....

Victor was a sad case.... we cant play god.... we shouldn't play with fire.....never ever....never ever...now that song by i dont know who is humming in my mind....never ever.....STOP!!! urgh....the irony of the story is that it all started with love but turned out the utmost opposite....

Frankenstein....the movie directed by Kenneth Branagh portrays real life.....yes it does....cuba tgk balik.....it illustrates the both good and evil qualities in life. It showed the cost of running away from your responsibilities and how it took only one man to create a monster.

Franky was initially not a threat at all....he started out as kind and wanted to understand his surroundings....he longed for friends after learning of love, compasion and acceptance from a distance.... he was fond of the family he spied on....very much indeed..... he hoped the 'family' would appreciate the good things he did for them......

then...ta da....maybe big mistake he made (tapi sampai bilakah seseorang itu harus bersembunyi bukan) - he made his apperane presence - but alas!!! only the blind old man accepted him...the others? they were disgusted by the sight of this Franky 'creature' assuming the initially kind Franky was there to harm them.....

Oh dear...oh my.....physical appearance means so much more than mental capacity...physical appearance means so much more than what someone has inside them to potentially give...... and what struck me was that we all...all of us have a little bit of this ugly character inside of us.....

Tragedy by tragedy confronts him, but his creator was no where in sight to take responsibility... hes creator betrayed him.....Franky wanted revenge......he ran away and opted for the easy way out...just shoot Franky he says....how could you Victor...how could you shoot something you yourself created....

It wasnt his fault Franky acted like that.....you Victor...youre suppose to be the smart one....but initially he lost to a 'monster' he didnt even finish off..... in this case my dear readers...(err ada ke readers?) being 'intelligent' only brought misery......

we all need love......but love alone is never enough, for what is love??? SOmeone once said, okay not someone but a quote or proverb or something like that...." Love is when you lust for whats inside and Lust is when you love what you see".... oh dearie!

We need love, yes we do....but discipline and guidance...being balanced...will make sure we dont turn into a selfish, self centered immature man like Victor Frankenstein ****thunder and lighting bolt strikes*******

Never start something if you know you cant uphold your responsibility to it...you could and many people do...until its too late....well...perhaps we can all learn.... just continue to learn......

Terima Kasih dan Selamat Malam!

AAAAAAAHHHH bestnya dapat menulis.....

live and love...please....

2009-08-10T19:21:00.000-07:00

what do you do...what do you do......

thank you...i say just thank you.......

no matter what or how you are living life...you can always excel and change things...make things better...

live life or love life...... do whatever u can within your means to live and love life..... with the most important people in your life...your family.......

Reading

2009-08-08T05:23:00.000-07:00

Reading........The best book that soothes my wondrous, on-the-go (as someone once put it) soul has to be reading the QUran.... its an exquisite book really.... magnificent poetry inter-winded with beautiful magical storytelling that touches you deep down.......amazing.... unexplainable....

Tonight was surah at taubah- literay means repent.... A chapter on Repent....How If someone does not keep to their word and promise, then we should always fight back... for a promise should always be honored.....Always.......but if they repent, if they then realize what they did was wrong.... forgive them, for God Forgives and accepts those who repents their wrongdoings....

We should also always give "time" for people 'to think' about something.... such in the case when the 'enemies' went against their word in Makkah....they too were given 3 months to think and make a choice.....just goes to show...never ever make a decisions hastily.... and always allow a little time for humans to get into gear...and drive their thoughts with reasoning to their intended destination.....

Im giving myself "time"..... to ease, to think, to see what will happen..... it hurts...but it shall be a part of me and life i shall cherish...berani buat berani tanggung......

I felt so calm after.....which is right now...... Im gonna do more reading..trying to make sense of Friendmans the World is Flat..... though economy and free market capatilsm isnt really my cuppa of little black beans..... but if its gonna effect me.....might as well........ decaf yes...without sugar too! Nite...

:) Aaaaaahhhhh books...what shall art thou without???

2009-08-08T01:49:00.000-07:00

Oh what a Malaysia im living in..... street protests....tear gasses...YB's dying...bullshitting by politicians... fake nonsense here and there....

Education, helathcare a huge issue i wish and i care...a population of the old not being cared for...the menatally ill, the poor, the single moms, the whore, the addicts......... oh what a Malaysia im living in....

Too much bickering, too much talking.... people dying and no one wants to take the blame....shame...shame...shame!!!!! Oh wait, toooooo much corruption.....toooooo much...as if we dont know.....hulur sana...hulur sini...baru boleh jalan, baru boleh beri........it makes you wonder it makes you think....

You give sweets and worthless candy treats.... when the cake you cut and eat it piece by piece.... The cake...the cake.....well, its only for friends and family..... so tag along...behind my tail coz im behaving like a monkey!

Frustrated i mite be..frustrated as you can see me..... i still believe in goodness...i still believe we can make a diffrence merely by our actions and sincere intentions.....

Not all are bad, but what makes me sad? Makes me sad...and drives me mad...... the potential to be the best....to care for the rest.... wasted...wasted....wasted..... coz people dont use theyre brains to think no more....!!!!

This blog is here coz my thoughts need to be clear..... i WANT to think...i want to share coz at least i care....about whats going on inside there... inside where? Everywhere especially...up there.... up here....

Anyhow.....What a LIFE im leading..... just like the Malaysia...i too have issues and troubles that needs to be sorted ot....coz like Malysia the potential i see in myself....its huge...be the best i can be, hey it aint easy..... tapi kata, 1Malaysia...... jadi saya pun nak ikutlah!!! huhu

Rite i end this rambling....by saying.....perceptions are crucial.... and perceptions need to be managed.....

The end.....

Its ME

2009-08-04T03:02:00.000-07:00

I feel lonely,
I feel empty,
Yet i have everything going on for me,

Its...me...its me that will make things happen for myself and my family.....

I am ridiculous to think that someone else will be able to fill my emptiness....

someone else i dont even know....someone else that wouldnt even care....

Its me...its me that will determine my future.....based on actions....based on determination...

I need to keep the fire burning in me...... Please dear Lord, dont let it die.....

The beautifull mind....

2009-05-10T21:00:00.000-07:00

"If i have a thousand ideas a year, and only one turns out to be good, im satisfied" so says Alfred Nobel....

A myriad of ideas... human creativity..its a gift... breaking away from the norm from established patterns, creating something new....

an imaginative dreamer...and then switching back to rational, mundane normal thinking is a must...
the light and dark sides of creativty is obvious ..creative people are often possesed by their creativity....

whatver, however lets believe that creativity is among the best expects of human existence...

No its not about me... things shouldnt be... however it should be about pride and dignity....

nahhh not suppose make sense................ things i want to remember and remind myself about...

test 1,2,3....;)